Mastication procrastination

It’s been at least a month since I’ve had some bizarre encounter with a healthcare professional, so I can feel my creative writing juices drying up. The psychiatrist and clinical psychologists I met at work yesterday don’t count because they weren’t carrying a brown file with my name on it and there were no horribly embarrassing misunderstandings.

My only chance of inspiration in the near future is if I book my extremely long overdue dental checkup. About six years overdue to be precise. I’ve been saying to the spouse for three months now, ” If I don’t do anything else today/ this weekend/ next week/ before I die, I  MUST make a bloody dental appointment.” The spouse patiently replies every time I say it, “Yes, you must. Go and bloody make it.”

I suspect that the amount of work that needs doing will provide plenty of writing inspiration. I’m a complete dental phobic and ever since I bit down hard on the bonnet of a car which pulled out in front of me while I was on my bike, I live in fear of all the resulting work having to be redone which, enhanced by the workings of my vivid imagination at three in the morning, makes me even worse.

Fortunately my dentist is my brother, but he does always like to remind me as he’s doing an injection, of the hell me and my sister put him through with our public singing thirty-odd years ago on the top deck of the No.59 bus…

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4 Responses to “Mastication procrastination”


  1. 1 not quite like beethoven February 3, 2010 at 9:04 pm

    I’m glad you found such a great way of turning health care professionals into an asset. But I just cannot imagine giving my siblings the chance to befuddle me and fiddle inside my mouth. Looking forward to your recounts.

  2. 4 kentigern February 4, 2010 at 10:00 am

    As he probably advised I’d made a similar pilgrimage only last week, escaped with scale and polish and then of course the obligatory red wine mouthwashing.


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