The Midas Touch

Sodium streetlights are absolutely horrible. They illuminate everything with a nasty municipal orange glow and make sorting the colours of your mother’s wheelie bins very difficult when she remembers it’s bin day at one in the morning. Mama telling you that there’s a black one, a brown one and a grey one is bugger all use when your eyes tell you they’re all sludge-coloured.

The memory of unsuccessfully attempting to colour match bins in the dark at the kerbside, with the telescopes of the Neighbourhood Watch committee trained upon me, was still fresh as I stared into the unforgiving streetlamp right outside our bedroom window the other night. In the darkness and lashing rain, the sodium glare was more intense than usual. Then something interesting happened. As I looked, the tree across the road suddenly transformed itself into sparkly gold before my very eyes. Wow, a golden tree. Amazing, I thought, but I know that tree’s not made of gold, it’s made of, er…tree material. The sudden encroachment of this knowledge caused the golden tree to turn straight back into a normal one again. Ha! Wait a minute, I thought, I’ll tell myself it’s made of gold and bring it back. It worked instantly, and was so pretty that I got my camera out and took a photo.

The photo looked like a dull picture of a rain-soaked tree illuminated by a nasty sodium lamp.

Try it yourself, but leave out the taking of the photo bit.

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2 Responses to “The Midas Touch”


  1. 1 kentigern July 16, 2010 at 3:18 pm

    I thought you and spouse went home on the train? Mama doesny remember her taxi ride home and I don’t recall you being in there either.

    Old kentigern assumes you got home safely or camped out in the wheelie bins???????????

    Luv, bruv

    • 2 moiradancer July 16, 2010 at 3:56 pm

      Fear not, we made it safely to the 23:03 with ten minutes to spare. The wheelie bin incident was during last week’s visit. Mama couldn’t remember which colour was meant to go out, so I had to wheel each bin alongside the neighbour’s to try and match the colour in the dark. I didn’t succeed.


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