Make a colourful cover for your beige NHS hearing aid

The remnants bin at the local fabric shop was the site of an unseemly battle with a determined pensioner over some Lycra scraps. The pensioner won, holding aloft a prized shocking pink piece like a trophy scalp en route to the till, but I came off not too badly. I got enough bargain offcuts to fashion these prototype hearing aid covers, and about 500 more, should the need ever arise.

If you fancy having a go yourself, there’s a link to BatteryBot’s patent template below, and I’ll do a tutorial if anyone wants one. In the meantime, just hide any dodgy stitching on the side next to your head…

hearing aid cover pattern template

update 17 Jul 2013: Hearing aid cover tutorial

Hat Couture

It was the end of term Christmas Quiz party yesterday and BatteryBot had made me this charming pair of hearing aid Santa hats, to get me in a suitably festive mood for the occasion.

I must say they came in very useful when it came to the Christmas Wrapping Round, where the challenge was to wrap a willing team member with whatever materials were to hand. My colleagues enthusiastically swathed me in a dusty old sheet and some cellophane, and topped it off with a big feather plume stuck down my cleavage. The finishing touch involved wrapping my head with a large sheet of gold tissue paper, a process which took some time without the assistance of sticky tape, and proved to be very noisy despite the sound baffling qualities of my Santa hats.

As I waddled precariously to the stage looking like a post-Apocalypse version of the Statue of Liberty, I was told I looked uncharacteristically glamorous…

Ear Candy

Inspired by Clara’s crusade to banish the beige, I spent a nice Saturday making these lacquered paper and foil slip-on hearing aid covers. Although they were spared from the latest leak from the upstairs neighbours’ shower yesterday, it alerted me to the fact that plastic might be slightly more practical in a wet climate. Another design flaw emerged when I tried them on. They may look quite pretty in a photo, but they’re completely invisible behind my giant left lug, which seems to be rapidly assuming old man proportions.

Worse still, I’ve got a bit of explaining to do when the spouse discovers that his beautiful and expensive hand printed Japanese paper collection is full of tiny hearing aid shaped holes…